stalker

It seems I have my own personal stalker. A pretty pathetic story, but I can't help being slightly amused by it. So here goes:
I got a message on my mobile on Tuesday, a man whose voice I couldn't quite recognise, saying in French "Ah, the number is working, I'll try again later". He signed off saying he was Jean something. I assumed at first it was K's friend who had left the week before and immediately erased the message without thinking much about it. I did wonder why he would try to call me. But then I realised it hadn't been JC that the guy had said, but rather JL. JL? And I suddenly remember something I'd totally forgotten.
Sometime in Autumn, I got a little scribbled note in the mail. It looked like it'd been written in a hurry, on the corner of a table, in hushed secret. It came from JL, who had gotten the address from mum after unsuccessfully asking for my email. Yes, the Brittany neighbour. The note could have come from a 13 year old, as it betrayed a rather unexpected dose of immature fantasying. It said something like "I dreamed of you, then opened my eyes and you were gone. Since then I've been looking for you. I'm waiting for you" and giving details of ways to contact him. I was shocked and amused, tore the piece of paper up and forgot about the whole thing - until the phone call earlier this week.
The phone call was followed by a series of sms and probably another message on the voice mail I didn't listen to, declaring feelings in the saddest of ways. He seems to have constructed an image of me that can't have much to do with the actual me - but he's far into his constructed fantasy and doesn't realise that I've nothing to do with it. I feel sorry for him - but most of all I'm disturbed and annoyed.
Disturbed because I am planning on going to Britanny this summer. So far I've ignored all his attempts so as not to reward him. But once I'm there, it'll be trickky and I have little enthusiasm for the prospect of explaining to this poor guy that he can just forget about everything (eeeew). And annoyed because I don't know how he got my number. Mum's there right now, but I can't imagine her giving my number away. So did he look into her booklet while she wasn't around? I feel he needs a good slap in the face to wake up.

In any case, as I told friends and close collegues at work about my stalker, it turned out that they also had stalker stories. When S was 19, a university teacher of hers had taken a liking to her and left notes on her bike, called her, checked what bus she took and where she was. It sounded really bad. I don't know how that ended. As for R, he recently ended up hassled by a girl he'd (unsuccessfully) asked on a date nearly 20 years ago and hadn't seen or had contact with in ten. For some unknown reason, she remembered that he'd had asked her out and tracked him down, accusing him of still loving her and insulting him for having left Chili without telling her.

And to conclude this entertaining piece, let's see what wikipedia has to say about stalkers:

"In "A Study of Stalkers," Mullen et al (2000) identify six types of stalkers:

• Rejected stalkers: pursue their victims in order to reverse, correct, or avenge a rejection (e.g. divorce, separation, termination).
• Resentful stalkers: pursue a vendetta because of a sense of grievance against the victims - motivated mainly by the desire to frighten and distress the victim.
• Intimacy seekers: The intimacy seeker seeks to establish an intimate, loving relationship with their victim. To them, the victim is a long sought-after soul mate, and they were 'meant' to be together.
• Eroto-manic stalker: This stalker believes that the victim is in love with them. The erotomaniac reinterprets what their victim says and does to support the delusion, and is convinced that the imagined romance will eventually become a permanent union. They often target a celebrity or a person of a higher social status (though it is important to note, not all celebrity stalkers are erotomaniacs).
• Incompetent suitor: despite poor social/courting skills, possess a sense of entitlement to an intimate relationship with those who have attracted their amorous interest.
• Predatory stalker: spy on the victim in order to prepare and plan an attack - usually sexual – on the victim."

Ah well, knowledge is reassurance. I already feel a lot better.