Special K

K is moving out this weekend to another WG. It's good in some ways, but also saddening. We've spent the last two months implicitely redefining the relationship, and I was hoping to lay the ground for our future ties and friendship. I sometimes have the feeling this failed completely, as miscommunications sometimes left both of us, I guess, or me for sure, feeling like this was a pointless effort.
I wonder how often we will meet once he's moved out.
In those moments of miscommunication, I feel a certain sense of failure, in that after all those years, we still haven't found an easy way to discuss certain issues that are important to us, we will still sometimes say things in a hurtful way, as if respect for one another had to go away with the deconstruction of the couple identity. But there are also pleasant moments, and the feeling goes away.
I think I am drawing one important lesson from all this - At last - which is not to lay the source of my own strength outside of myself. Nor to think that I am carrying part of somebody else's strength.

Which probably all sounds like esoteric-sociologic abstract bullocks.